Well, That’ll Learn Me
Joelle said around mid-afternoon on August 3, 2004
I just got yelled at for giving a homeless and/or crazy and/or cracked out man some food. I was coming out of Sally Beauty (I was out of shampoo) and I passed him on my way into 7-Eleven for a Diet Pepsi Slurpee. He was sitting on the ground, rocking back and forth, panhandling for change. He asked if I had money, which I didn’t (plastic, but I wouldn’t have given him cash anyway), so I said no and went into the store. I heard him say something about having not eaten as I walked away, so while it could have been bullshit, I figured I’d get him some snacks. So I grabbed a hot dog, a bag of chips, some milk and an apple (might as well make it sort of nutritious, right?).
When I came out, I handed him the sack, and I could see him eyeballing it, surveying the contents, possibly for a forty. I said, “Here you go, doll.” and started to walk away. He tore into the bag (minus a thank you, but I didn’t really expect one), rocking and mumbling about there finally being someone human in the world. But, alas, my warm n’ fuzzy was promptly dashed when he screamed out after me, “Apple! APPLE?! I ain’t got teef, you BITCH! You tryin’ ta be funny!?”
Yes. Yes, sir, I was trying to be funny. I thought to myself, “I think I’ll spend my limited cash on getting your stank ass some dinner; you look like you need it. But first, I’ll be really clever and get you an apple you can’t eat! Mwahahahhaa!” Insert hand wringing and crazy eyes here. Actually, it crossed my mind to get him a banana, but given his living situation, I thought the apple might be more durable. Sue me. Jeez.
In other news, I was listening to NPR on the way home and I heard that the hearings for Lynndie England are underway. Good. Man, I can’t even imagine what it must be to be her right now. There are no words to describe the shame and humiliation she must feel. Or should feel. Or something. I’m not good at talking politics and current affairs. I’m going to shut up before I start a brouhaha. Is that how you spell brouhaha?
Moxie Design Studios™
Bwahahaha! Not to make fun of the homeless person, but that was the most unintentionally funny thing I’ve heard about…
I am sure this person later thought about apple squash..I would had...I bet I’d make a good homeless person because of that too...heh
geez, like you were mocking him. gift horse? mouth?
about that trial, it’s hard to know what to think. she’s only 21. which one of us didn’t do irresponsible and stupid things when we were 21? does that excuse it? no. but a courtmartial? isn’t that a bit much? i really don’t know how i feel about it. i’m waffling.
from paris, france
yep, brouhaha that is
A charismatic but stinky homeless was living just under my window, a couple of years ago. His begging was more a racket than anything and even if I knew that he had all the food he needs as I saw a large amount of breads and goods on the park bench where he sat, slept, yelled and peed, that he had all the drink he wanted as his friend (the guy who gave his pitbull pet some expensive paté with his hand every day) was opening a bottled of champagne every day too (probably not the best though) and had a cellular, I could not ignore him as he was on my way every time I was going in and out of my building.
So once, I told him (because the cash I gave him several time -imagine when I came back at dawn from some parties or discos or whatever with dates or not and that Patrick ass was there at my door, laughing- was too small and unsignificant for him, yes...) that I’ll bring back a sandwich.
Which I did but that ass, moaned “not from the 140? “ ( 140 being the good baker of the street, the almost every year baguette maker champion, with goooood and expensive sandwiches). I replied “no, can’t afford it for myself!”. He said nothing but had a bad look to me…
Back home, I looked at the window to his place and saw no more sandwich. I looked to the transparent street trash can and saw something that could have been it. Grrrrrrrrr
Brouhaha !
I’m retired Air Force. She may or may not have been following an (unlawful) order but everyone in the military knows this: shit rolls downhill. She’s the lowest ranking person in the pile, so, she’s gonna be taken down the hardest.
Thats was really nice of you. Sometimes well i dont know if anymore but before at grand cetneral station there was a homeless guy that looked just like my father like it could have been his twin brother or something. Well the first time I saw this guy I felt so bad I asked him if I could get him sometime to eat and he said ok so i went across the street and McD’s and got him a meal well the 2nd time I saw him I got to talking to him and told him he looks just like my dad and asked him if i could get him food again and he goes son dont get my pickels this time i fucking hate them. This is so not the same but the point is that you did a really food thing even if the guy was a dick about the apple.
I would have spun on my heel, faced him and said “You ingrate. Good thing you have no teeth because if you did, I’d kick them right out of your mouth. Beggars can’t be choosers. Get a job”
What an ass hole.
... well ... it’s the thought that counts, right? You tried, hon, and for that, you are a saint.
Cammie’s right, beggars can’t be choosers. But keep in mind that many of the homeless like that are mentally ill and a reaction like that could be considered typical.
from Iowa
It goes to show you that no good deed goes unpunished. You did something really nice and fairly spontaneous. He turned it into something else by yelling at you.
Like BillH said, no good deed goes unpunished. Gahds we humans suck.
from U.S.A.
dude that sucks! You know that was awesome of you even if he was all weird about it. Not a lot of people would do that plus you held your tongue. Its too bad he didn’t appreciate it, but you know what you’re a good person. You should be proud of yourself.
from Glen Ellyn
Good for you Joelle! (and it wasn’t even Friday) He may have acted like a jerk about it, but he’s probably not well mentally. Either way, he’s better off having come in contact with you. You Rock!! Now go polish your tiarra and get back to work. LOL
well, *I* thought you were funny ... even if he didn’t.
an apple. *giggle*
hmm..what’re those sayings?
Beggars can’t be choosers.
It’s the thought that counts.
yep, that’s them. you may be a funny lady, but you’re a nice lady. bank those good karma points
wtf is going on with your blog though??? it’s all um..not right, right now.
from paris, france
I guess that I maybe should post only in European BB’s or blogs because life is so different here and I can be mistaken.
Misery is awfull and people in great need can react on an unexpected way.
In my country, misery is different. Maybe because there’s more subventions. A lot of people are taking it as a posture and live rather well with begging (I mean when you can have a cellular and Champagne every day, feed a big dog with delicatessen you’re not in misery as I know it). It’s very difficult to know when you deal with someone in need or a pure asshole so there’s hesitations… I assume that when we choose to make a gesture, we should not expect anything in return and it’s difficult sometimes.
That is for theory. It’s of course very different to deal with it emotionally when the respons is strange… C’est la vie !
Bye!
from San Diego, CA • Cocktail: slightly dirty Grey Goose martini
I assume that when we choose to make a gesture, we should not expect anything in return and it’s difficult sometimes.
I didn’t expect anything in return. That wasn’t the point of this entry.
You should have thrown the apple at him. That’s what I do. Throw stuff. And kick. I kick homeless people. And puppies.
Only in America would a bum bitch about the food that was given to him. Jeez.
from California
Go back next week and buy him a coconut.