“Listen! Do You Smell Something?”
Joelle said around lunch time on August 13, 2007
I have a kind of… situation. There is a mystery smell in my apartment. Now, before you start assuming I’m a crappy housekeeper, I assure you my home is quite tidy. All the garbage has been emptied, the disposal has been run extensively and deodorized. My sink was recently rooted… twice. My bathroom is immaculate (I even installed a new toilet seat yesterday), I burn smelly candles and all of my pilot lights have been checked. Nothing died in the fridge and from what I can tell, nothing is dead or dying in my home. There are no dead hookers in my mattress. None of my plants have root rot and there are no half-eaten anythings hiding anywhere. Fans are running in every room of the house. And yes, I did consider that it’s me. I’ve been assured that it’s not. *sniffs*
So… what gives?
Here’s the deal: I don’t smell it in my house at all until I leave. I can have the windows and door open all day long airing the place out or I can keep it shut up all day with no change in result. When I come home and unlock my front door, even if the windows have been left open, I smell what I thought at first was ammonia, like a litter box, but now has been determined to smell more like fuel or gas. This sent me in a wild panic to check all my pilot lights, but no, that’s all good.
Also, the smell never really enters my apartment. Once you’re in, the smell is gone. Once you’re a foot past the front door… poof! Disappears. If you try to go back and smell it in the same spot you just stood, it’s also gone. It’s like this strange scent that lives in a 1inch field of space just in the jamb of my front door. I don’t smell it when I’m outside, only as I swing the front door in to go inside. Once inside, the smell is gone.
I feel like I’m taking crazy pills here. What could it be? Airplane fumes? Car exhaust? Electrical problems with the building? Olfactory haunting? What is it?
Moxie Design Studios™
from West Palm Beach, FL • Cocktail: Champagne Bellini
I HATE THAT.
Is Jimmy Hoffa buried in the threshold?
Do you have a storm door or just the one front door? If there is a storm door, perhaps the sun beating on it all day is causing some kind of odor from the plastic or other stuff the door is made of??? I’m grasping at straws here because I can’t think of anything else!
Could the smell be seeping in from one of your neighbor’s apartments? Or do any of your neighbors have pets that might be hanging out near your doorstep? Sometimes they can track goop around. Just a thought. Really a shot in the dark.
from Virginia Beach, VA • Cocktail: Calypso Cooler
Is your front door in a place where there could have been a water leak? If water has leaked into the inside of your walls and has gone untreated, then black mold will grow within the walls between the gypboard and the insulation and it will stink. If this is the problem - that is not good, as mold is as bad as asbestos, so I hope that is not it. Wet insulation on it’s own will stink pretty bad too.
My other thought would be that a pet from a past tenant has peed, but it went beyond the carpet and padding and soaked the floorboards - which I have seen happen. My girlfriend could not track a smell and they finally ripped the carpeting out and the stained floorboards were there… they had to cut out the boards and replace them.
from UPSTAIRS, DUDE
Dude, I’m all paranoid now. My vote is the airplane exhaust..that or maybe you’re just smelling normal “gas” from the stove and wall heater unit.
Black mold. Asbestos. Pet crap. Jimmy Hoffa…
*shudders*
(***hahhahahahhaha, my word was “purpose”...reminded me of Ave Q! ha!)
from Phoenix
Sometimes when I first enter a house that uses natural gas, I catch a whiff of it. Also, not to totally freak you out, but you could have a gas leak and still have all your pilot lights be working. It might be worth a call to have your gas company come over and check it out.
from Laguna Hills, CA
I second the mold theory, especially if you’re only smelling it around the doorway.
from San Diego, CA • Cocktail: slightly dirty Grey Goose martini
I don’t think it’s a pet thing...these are completely new carpets, new padding, new tile… it’s all new. the building was built in 1955, though, so it’s possible that it could be mold. I’ll tell the building manager when I see him next. We should have that looked at. I ONLY smell it right there.
Have you thrown your peppers out? Those are right by the front door…
from kcmo
Some dirty little b--tard cat has sprayed the front of my house, namely my front door and when it gets hot in the summer it smells bad…
Any stinkin stray cats around??
from los angeles
I LOVE that Ghostbusters quote!!
Ooo, we had the same exact thing in our living room. One spot, one spot only, and it smelled...burnt. It turned out to be our window screens. They give off this weird burnt odor when they’re wet, or if it’s particularly windy. Does your front door have a screen? I so feel for you - trying to figure out an unknown smell almost drove me freaking nuts! Plus I must have looked a right idiot pacing back and forth in the front windows, inhaling deeply and then screaming, THE HELL?
from NY
I was going to suggest what Elizabeth said. Perhaps a cat sprayer is lurking in your ‘hood.
from San Diego, CA • Cocktail: slightly dirty Grey Goose martini
Oooooooo!!! The cat sprayer idea may be the best one yet. The
HitlerChaplin Cat that may have done it!You don’t have any empty apartments near you, do you? Sometimes if you don’t run the water for a while in a sink or tub/shower, the sewer gas can back up. It’s vented outdoors, so it does seem to come out of thin air.
from San Marcos, CA
I don’t know about the smell, but I have to grin at the shout-out to ‘Ghostbusters’ in your title. Not necessarily cinematic gold as a whole, but I’ve always thought the comedic value of that one line has been vastly underrated. Props.
The Hitler Cat heard what you call him. He’s paying you back.
I just had a conversation yesterday about the mystery stench. I have cleaned both high and low and still the smell persists! It is driving me outta my mind.
I’m voting for the stray cat theory. Neighborhood cats have sprayed my front door on occasion. Stinky!
from romania
I had a run in with a mysterious smell once....cound not locate the source.....but i found out that a rat died in my walls ...
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