Cookie Coup
Joelle said in the early morning on August 13, 2008
I noticed last night that in commercials for Oreo cookies, the people in different commercials all eat their Oreo exactly the same way: twist open, lick once, put back together, then dunk and eat. I don’t feel Oreo is best representing a wide cross-section of Oreo eaters. It’s like they’re trying to set some kind of Oreo-eating standard. I have never in my entire life met anyone whose Oreo Process™ was that.
Oh, I don’t doubt they’re out there — those who absolutely must eat their Oreo just like they do in the commercial. But what about the artists? The rebels? What about those who just bite into it as-is? What about those who (*gasp!*) couldn’t give a damn about the “creme” filling? What about those who consume sans milk?!
Personally, my Oreo Process is as follows:
- Nibble off the top cookie in little bites like a mouse.
- Scrape off the “creme” filling with my bottom teeth in small bits. Never lick.
- Nibble bottom cookie at my leisure.
- Store on my thighs for Winter.
I’m not saying it should be done like this, per se. I just don’t understand why Oreo feels they have to force their belief system on the rest of us. We’re buying and eating your cookie, Nabisco. What more do you want from us? Our souls?
Moxie Design Studios™
from Canada
I’m a full-on dunker. Not nibbling, no biting—just straight into the milk a half at a time and straight into the gullet. Nice, simple, clean and efficient good eatings!
from SD CA (this week) • Cocktail: Red Headed Slut
I’m with Stacey.
BTW, you’re probably talking about the commercial with the little redhead girl on the train, right? All I have to say is that the Asian little girl is ornery.
from San Diego, CA • Cocktail: slightly dirty Grey Goose martini
haha! yes, that commercial, but all of them. They do it in the one I posted above and in 2 others I’ve seen. It’s an epidemic of Oreo fascism!
from San Diego, CA • Cocktail: slightly dirty Grey Goose martini
p.s. the dad in the commercial above is a little creepy.
from Santa Barbara, CA
Joelle, I eat my cookies the same way, except that I use my top teeth for the cream. i also find it fascinating to scrape off the first bit in such a way that I can see my row of teeth indented into it. This works much better with Double Stuf cookies, which has a more firm cream than the regular ones. With those cookies I also just take the top off and eat it directly, since it’s not as secure on the cookie as the regular ones.
I eat them as is except I leave them out for a day or two with the package open so the cookies will get soft. Apparently, I’m such a delicate flower that I find the regular Oreo cookie consistenty too hard for my poor teeth. Bleh. I tend to not eat many Oreos anyway. It’s definitely one of those things where a little goes a long way.
I like Double Stuffed (I just snorted as I typed that because it seems so dirty). I take the top off, eat it, and then, because I can usually get the cream off in one piece, I eat the bottom cookie. Then I eat the middle. I’m weird.
I remember a few (or at least one) commercial in which the method was different, but you’re right. In general they are all the same. And also, the guy in the commercial you posted (I didn’t actually watch it, so this is just the impression I get when I see that first screen shot) totally looks like he’s about to suck my soul out and dunk his Oreo in that instead of milk, so yes. Nabisco wants our souls.
from West Palm Beach, FL • Cocktail: Champagne Bellini
Double Stuff Oreos should be outlawed. They took a perfectly good cookie and made it suck. Sometimes too much cream is just that. Too much.
Kathy’s Oreo Process™: I pry the cookie open, sometimes failing… and eat the top piece dunked in milk, naked. (remove all random cream bits before dunking) Then I slowly eat the cream off (ew) until bottom cookie is clean. Dunk bottom half.
Repeat until I shit Oreo out of my ears.
from San Diego, CA • Cocktail: slightly dirty Grey Goose martini
@Kathy: I can’t wait till you get here next week; I’ll introduce you to the glory of the Jo-Jo, Trader Joe’s Oreo knock-off. WAY WAY better than an Oreo. Like, you’d go “Oreo who?”
@amy t: I can’t say Double Stuft without making that extra “fffttttt!” sound at the end. And thinking of porn.
@patricia: I don’t mind them a little stale myself!
@Jennifer: I can’t do my top teeth because I have a tiny gap in between my two front teeth and seeing that in the ‘creme’ just… doesn’t sit with me. I know, I’m weird.
from Troy, NY
I have two approaches:
1. Straight Up Dunking until it’s nearly falling apart, put in mouth, suck out milk and mush cookie with tongue. Swallow
2. Remove top cookie, use tongue to scrape entire cream out (scraping teeth on cookie feels weird to me), then put cookie parts together and eat. Dunking optional.
Double stuuuuuffed...mmmmmm *drool*
I’m one of the only people I know who has multiple Oreo Processes (Processi?), and I use them in no discernible pattern. Sometimes I eat the top cookie first, then the creme, then the bottom. Sometimes with dunking, sometimes not. Sometimes creme first. Sometimes I eat it in concentric circles, making a smaller and smaller Oreo as I go.
I think it depends on the mojo of the cookie itself. I eat the cookie how it *wants* to be eaten.
And I agree, the dad in that video? Is evil, and must be stopped.
Exactly.
from My living room
OMG girl, you are so funny!
I’m a dunker too- no unscrewing of the cookie, no nibbling or lapping of the cream, nope, none of that- I’m all business- dunk and dunk until it’s wet and soft and then finish it off.
*Doh* now I’m both hungry and horny. LOL. Just playing geeeeeeezzzzz.
I don’t dunk it in milk, i just open it and scrape the cream with my teeth then eat the whole cookie.