Delerious Designers Guide to Insults

Joelle said at some point on August 28, 2003

her: GAAAAAAAAAAA I SUCK
me: awwwwwww
me: you suck bezier!
her: i totally suck bezier
me: hahahahahah
her: heheh
her: my curve looks like a limp dick
me: I just snorted
her: lol
me: that’s like such a designer’s insult
me: “Oh yeah! Well, your bezier looks like a limp dick!”
her: BAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH
me: “your mama’s a bezier!”
her: i just spit water

her: “you bezier tool!”
her: “up your bezier”
me: up your bezier!
me: hahahahahahahahhahaha
her: bahahhahaha
me: eat my bezier!
her: im dying
her: BAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA
me: bezier is the new chmod
her: HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
her: suck my bezier
her: cram it in your bezier
me: HAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAAHAHHAAHAH
me: I’m crying over here
her: omg
me: *pants pant*
me: PANTS!?
me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
her: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
me: omg
her: is that a bezier in your pants?
me: i’m so blogging this.
her: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
me: prepare for a trackback
me: hahahahaah
me: ping me in the bezier
her: HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

Mirror, Mirror on the…Awww, Crap

Joelle said around dinner time on July 1, 2003

I’m home now. I finished 4 of the 7 banners I had to reversion (yeah, doesn’t seem like a lot, but trust me, these are complicated banners) and only managed to leave work 40 minutes late.  I do have to go in early tomorrow, but whatever.  As long as I don’t have to work this weekend, I’m a happy girl.

Though, imagine my delight when I got into my 6000 degree car to find that my rearview mirror was dangling from the windshield by a cord because the heat had melted the super duper hold-up-a-building epoxy that attached it to the glass. Nice, huh?  So, I drove all the way home with my mirror swinging, complete with magic tree (in coconut), looking like a Clampett in my beat-to-hell Chevy Cavalier. [cue Dueling Banjos]

I was supposed to go to that Mary Kay party tonight, but wanted to get in a walk to blow off some steam, which I did, and now I am home — showered, Hornsby hard cider in hand, looking to unwind.

*breathe*

So, I’m back now.  Little Mary Sunshine, right?  heh.  Tomorrow is another day, etc. blah and so on.

I suppose I should be thankful I didn’t get crapped on.

In a World of Suck

Joelle said at some point on June 4, 2003

Let me open this Wednesday with a rousing “Craaaaaaaaaap!” Well, that didn’t help much.  I almost didn’t blog because I’m just that kind of feh today.  But, I thought it might help me feel better.

I woke up feeling just kind of meh this morning (do you see a trend in my descriptive words? Even my eloquence has gone to hell today.) My alarm clock is fritzing and it makes these jacked up duck noises at me now, mixed in with Morning Edition on NPR, which sucks.  I had a lackluster workout, didn’t feel motivated or invigorated by it at all, which also sucks.

Allow me to list for you my remaining moments of suck:

1. I pinched my finger in the little door of my gas thingie on my car.
2. A guy pulling into 7-Eleven to get gas banged into the back of me with his jeep.  Not my car—me.
3. About 5 miles from my house, a bird shit straight into my sunroof, all in my hair and down the shoulder and sleeve of my shirt.
4. After driving home, showering, changing and starting over, I was late for work.
5. About 2 miles from work, I hit a bunny. 
6. And then I pulled over and cried like the hormonal, sappy little bitch that I am.

The only bright point of my morning was sitting at a stoplight next to an apple-red Mustang Cobra convertible, complete with cobra emblems and license plate frame, which had a driver that looked like I’d imagine Perry Mason would if he was a Hell’s Angel.  He had his tunes cranked up, the top down and he was really into it.  Into what, you might ask?  Enya.  Would you believe Orinoco Flow?  Now that I think about it, I don’t know if that’s a bright point or not.

Wednesday? Hump this.

Apparently, I have Moxie.

Joelle said in the early afternoon on February 13, 2003

So, Sphinxy and I have joined forces. We are now the Wonder Twins of blog design.  Hurrah!  I’m so flattered that she thinks I’m swell enough to share some of her Moxie. Basically, it just means if she becomes overloaded, she’ll be sharing some of her work with me and, should someone want my designs, I’ll be designing under the BlogMoxie umbrella so that we share some love.

Wonder Twin powers...activate!
Form off...a bucket of water!

What the hell were they thinking when they chose what they wanted to be? Why could they only be animals or water things? That’s rather limiting isn’t it? 

But I digress.