There are the people with a lot of rules and strict do’s and don’ts about Twitter.  Then there are the people with a personal set of guidelines. I’m not really one for telling you how to do something — I believe people should use social networking in a way that’s meaningful to them and we should go with the flow, however it evolves.  But I do have some personal guidelines for my own optimum Twitter experience, to use it in way that’s meaningful to me.

Leah recently wrote a great list of “22 Reasons I’m Not Following You on Twitter” and most of her list I agree with (especially #1 and #18), but since I recently unfollowed a slew of people in a huff, the need to expound on and/or add a few guidelines of my own.

1. I try not to follow more than 100 people because, really… to actually read the posts of more than 100 people and still process and truly care about what’s being said… well, I just don’t have that kind of time. That’s the brutal truth.  Maybe some can handle a few hundred smoothly, but those who follow several hundred, perhaps thousands of people can’t possibly read and process that amount of information while giving them reasonable consideration and still have a life.  That’s just my point of view — it’s quality over quantity for me.   I may have to push that to 150, though.
2. If you are my friend “in real life”, I will most likely follow you no questions asked. If you do not follow me back, I won’t pretend my feelings won’t be a little hurt (because I’m human), but since I believe in one’s right to do whatever they need to do for themselves, I’ll get over it. I can’t have my own rules without respecting my friends’, even if I may not like it.  And because of this, if you are my friend in real life, but participate in some of the latter-mentioned offenses, I will probably unfollow you.
3. If you are someone I’ve never met and/or someone I only know by your blog name, are a client and/or someone who is a fan of The Moxie Girls or our book, it really depends on two main factors whether or not I can follow you back:
   If you’re a client, I try to keep those sorts of exchanges on the @moxiegirls twitter account. Unless we’ve been working together for a very long time and/or you’ve read my blog, know I’m imperfect and still like me anyway.

   If you’re any of the others, it just depends on how close we are, if I recognize your name, and if I read/used to read your blog.  If all else fails, see #1.  But you can rest assured it’s probably not personal if I don’t follow you back. If it is personal, then you probably already know that and don’t follow me either.

4. If you tweet a lot and I mean A LOT, I’m out.  Not 5 times a day or 10 times a day, but 5-10 tweets in a row… five to ten times a day. My personal philosophy is if it takes more than 280 characters to say, write a blog entry. I realize sometimes you want to say something that is more than 140 characters, but not long enough for a blog post. I have that problem a lot, so if you must continue your thought into the next tweet, have at it. But if it takes 5 tweets to finish just one thought, take it to the blog.
5. Incessant celebrity brown-nosing is a booooooore.  There, I said it.  I don’t give a pig’s twisted dingle what Ashton has to say, but I understand that you do.  And I respect your right to respond on occasion, I do follow some celebrities myself.  But I don’t respect daily desperate pleas for them to throw you a bone.  Most celebrities won’t respond.  That’s why they’re celebrities. Enjoy what they have to say and stop starfucking. It’s embarrassing.
6. If Jesus is the reason for your tweetin’, chances are I won’t follow you back and/or may unfollow you if your tweets get a little too churchy in nature.  I respect your right to believe whatever you like, to tweet the same, and I don’t mind an inspirational post once in a while, I appreciate the sentiments — but once God and Jesus start getting bandied about regularly, I have to politely decline to participate.  I’d feel the same if you were talking about woodland fairies, right-wing politics or alien abductions.
7. If you don’t tweet ever or very rarely, I will most likely unfollow you (or not follow you from the get-go).  See #1.
8. Call me self-centered, but I’ll probably unfollow you if you don’t tweet about stuff that I’m interested in or if you tweet constantly about your drunken escapades (i.e., most tweets begins with “man, I was so wasted last night”, “how did I get here?” or “look at my boobs”). I don’t begrudge your right to get liquored up and flash the bartender for a free shot… every night.  But I did that in 1996 — now I’d rather watch Bravo.  Go on with your bad self, just don’t expect me to follow.  That goes double if I don’t personally know you and you don’t live in my city, since I don’t know who you’re with or where you are.
9. If all you’re interested in is ‘networking’, I’ll pass. It’s just not my thing.
10. And finally, my real biggie:  If you’re a live-tweeter and/or a spoiler whore, I will probably unfollow you.  And I’m totally serious. I feel bad when I do it, too because I genuinely like some of these people, but I’ve had too many movies, episodes and season finales ruined because some people can’t help but announce winners, share a plot point, or tell the ending.   And whomever decided live tweeting was a good idea was huffing rubber cement.  What about the people on the West Coast who haven’t even had the opportunity to see it air yet?  What about the people who use DVR ?  I’m not suggesting people wait several days to discuss the outcome of a television show, but could you perhaps wait until the next day?  And to those who say I should stay off Twitter if I don’t want to know, I say “unfollow”.  Why should I have to eschew Twitter starting at 4pm because you can’t keep your yap shut?

Just know that if you are following me and I’m not following you back, it’s not really personal… unless you take all that stuff personally.  I do respond to people who @ reply to me, so if you want me to follow you, the best way would be to say something to me!  I have lots of people who follow, but never say anything.  Say hi, introduce yourself, comment on something I’ve said.  It may just be a case of my not realizing that you’re even following me.

But if you’re more the lurking type, I appreciate the follow anyway.  It’s flattering that folks want to know what I’m tweeting about, even if it’s just bunnies and inappropriate YouTube links.  But I hope, at least, this clears up any potentially hurt feelings I may have inflicted.  It doesn’t mean I don’t like you anymore or I think you suck.  And if I no one gives a pig’s twisty what I think either… then don’t get pissy when I unfollow you for live tweeting the season premiere of Grey’s tonight.

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