Rich in Proteins and Emollients

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So this conversation just happened.

Kathy: How am I supposed to take a product seriously if they claim it contains ” summer snowflake bulb extract”? Was it harvested by nymphs on the Isles de Harmony?

Me: “It contains the tears of rare pink-tailed unicorns and the crystaline ballsweat of the enchanted forest imp.”

Kathy: Certified Organic ballsweat of the enchanted forest imp…
Kathy: this is another ingredient, and they’re totally serious
Kathy: Monk’s Pepper Berry Extract

Me: Ingredients: twigs, leaves, tibetan monk balls, water, fairy dander, pegasus dandelion ear wax and natural fragrances.

Kathy: tibetan monk ball extract.
Kathy: I dont pay 30 bucks for monk ball extract

Me: Warning: Processed in a facility that also processes pixie farts.

Remembering Etta

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I love Etta James — I’ve been a big fan for a long time, so I’m saddened to hear of her passing today at the age of 73.  She had myriad “demons”, as they say, and was plagued by health issues, but in spite of all that, was an amazing artist and a gift to my musical education.

I could go on and on about her — but it’s all been said. Instead, I’ll leave you with this piss-poor tribute: a terrible, occasionally pitchy recording of me singing “At Last” after 3 vodka cocktails in 2007, courtesy of Daniel.

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